Geez, Microaggression Much?!
It doesn’t matter who you are or what ethnicity — microaggressions are very uncomfortable, whether it is done unintentionally or intentionally. Now trust me we have ALL been guilty of this at some point in our lives until we knew better. But, when we know better, we should do better! Right?! So let’s look at the Oxford Dictionary meaning of what Microaggression is:
noun - a statement, action, or incident regarded as an instance of indirect, subtle, or unintentional discrimination against members of a marginalized group such as a racial or ethnic minority. Definitions from Oxford Languages
So now from this definition, you can see that it is more than a simple offensive comment or unconscious insult, unintentional or not, but it is an aggressive behavior from the insult-or but done in a passive way, due to the environment he/she may be in at the time. They are gut-wrenching actions, hurdled against a specific group with the sole intention of discriminating against them or outlining various stereotypes against them. In some instances, it can take the very shape of a compliment or a jest but it is far from it. The victim does not view it as a joking matter and could be highly affected.
Microaggression toward someone could cause that person to become very angry, depressed, lonely, and/or affect how they perform at work or school or in society as a whole.
Quick story - We were having a great conversation about this very topic with a close friend and ally. She stated that she heard one colleague insult another. When she confronted her colleague on what she’d said, the colleague told her she was being too sensitive and people are taking this DE&I movement too seriously. Say what??!! It is so easy for the insult-or to call the insult-ee, sensitive, as it lends an excuse to remove or simply pass by the insult-ors less than great behavior.
Let’s quickly share a few examples of microaggressions against people of color, people of different cultures or lifestyles. Also adding here a better way of handling.
Credited from: The Business Insider
When a white colleague tells a colleague of color 'You speak so well’.
What to say instead - Nothing!! You can commend a person's ideas without that statement.
'You're transgender? Wow, you don't look like it at all’.
What to say instead - Nothing!! Who made you the transgender police?! Your validation is not required.
“Oh sorry, I forgot your name, you all look alike.”
What to do instead - Learn your coworkers' names. It's a pretty basic concept.
'Oh, you're gay? You should meet my friend. She's gay, too!'
What to do instead - Nothing! If your coworker or friend of any sexual orientation wants your help meeting new people, they'll ask you.
“The way you've overcome your disability is so inspiring.”
What to do instead - Nothing! Geez! Advocate & Celebrate!
“Hey I think you're in the wrong room - I don’t think you belong in this meeting”
What to do instead - Don't assume people don't belong or make them feel as if they're outsiders - anyways who made you the Townhall Title Sorter?!
“Is that your real hair?”
What to say instead - Nothing!! A person's natural hair, regardless of their ethnicity, should be accepted as professional and workplace-friendly. Besides who made you the Hair Huncho in Charge!!??!
“Why are you wearing those head coverings?”
What to say instead - Nothing!! If you're curious about why religious people choose to wear certain articles of clothing, read books by those who do it. Do a little research. Don't go around asking random colleagues about their life choices. Geez - Google the info, please!
As it was said before, we all are and have been guilty of utilizing microaggression in some form, whether it was knowingly or unknowingly - we all are guilty - we all must learn, apply and do better. Hope this was enlightening and educational for everyone!! Love y’all for real!!!!
